Cream Cheese

I remember my mom buying cream cheese for my dad.  I think it was not too long after we came to Canada.  I’d be six or seven at the time.

It was a special treat  ’cause we didn’t have the money to live lavishly.  In those days it came in a box, wrapped and protected.  The very sight of it turned me off.  White cheese .. didn’t even look “creamy” so how could they call it “creamed” cheese.  I had no desire to sample this deadly white, soft, spreadable goop.  Dad was happy.  More for him.

As the years went by I made the leap and quickly learned that it was the perfect companion to a bagel, super in dips and absolutely perfect on a RyVita slice. 

Yesterday morning  I was having my RyVita with cream cheese and, for some unknown reason, I had an instant need to know what kind of cheese it was.  I’d never thought about that before, but suddenly it mattered.  No, I don’t know why.

They say that curiosity killed the cat.   That’s the “They” that are responsible for many of the wise notions in life. 

I took the tub of cheese and, adjusting my glasses to try and read the blue type on a grey background, I  viewed with incredulity the shocking truth. 

Cream Cheese is not Cheese.  No.  Not a drop of Brie or Gouda to be found.  Cream Cheese, fellow connoisseurs, is a delicious combination of milk ingredients (I get enough thanks), modified milk ingredients (huh?),  bacterial culture (yum,yum), salt, carob bean gum (my favourite), lactic acid (good for removing rust), potassium sorbate (a summer treat) and may contain sorbic acid (if there’s an industrial accident).

Why, it’s enough to put you off your dip. 

They can call it Cream Cheese if they want to but I’ll never look at a tub of the stuff the same way again.  Sorry, from now on in my books it will be simply known as white soft edible goop.

Hang on a moment!  That’s exactly how I saw it as a kid!   Who knew I could be that smart and not know it.